Age has its privileges

Age has its privileges

I remember when I was young; I would frequent certain restaurants or clubs because I knew someone who worked there.  Today at my present age I visit similar establishments because I know the owner(s).

This weekend my oldest son and his wife came in from out of town on business and decided to spend a couple of days visiting.  Other family members local to the area came by to say high and spend some quality time with their older brother.  Our home has always been the gathering place since everyone called our place home at one time or another.  We have lived in our present home for over 21 years.  My wife and I have discussed that if we ever bought a new home we would still keep this one.  We have way too many memories to just put a price on, at time of sale. 

There is one doorway leading from the garage to the mud room, where every member of the family has been measured for progress through the years, excluding my wife and myself.  Our back yard has no flowers or gardens because it was always meant to be a playground for our children and now grandchildren.  The size of our back yard is twice the size of any house backyard in the neighborhood.  Twenty-one years ago, we bought this house as much for the backyard as for any other feature of the feature loaded house.

Before we could move in we had to make sure that the backyard fence was enlarged to protect a larger portion of the area.  Also a doggie door had to be installed into the side of the garage (still within the fenced backyard area) for our family friend Teddy to come and go as he pleased.  If I mentioned how much extra the cost was you would either think that I was bragging or think I was foolish, so I won’t mention it.  However, you should know that my home and family have always been my priority, and their safety and happiness is most important.

On this outing 6 of our family members went to one of the fine waterfront establishments for brunch.  After setting up a table for six we were seated and prepared to enjoy a fine meal.  As I made my way to the food display area I heard my named called and I was pleasantly surprised to see my friend the owner of the restaurant and his family enjoying a meal.  I went over to say hello, and they proudly mentioned that they had just become grandparents for the first time.  I am an old pro at the grandfather game; I won’t mention how many we have because you will wonder why with the combination of children and grandchildren I still don’t qualify for my own casino.

Later as the restaurant owner and his family were leaving the restaurant they stopped by our table to say high to my family and proudly share pictures of their new addition to their family.  My children were impressed that they would come and share a private family moment with us.  Life is so relaxing when you can go out and enjoy a family moment amongst friends where not only, are you made welcomed, but with a personal touch.  Aging does have its privileges.  The best is yet to come….

Cocooning

Cocooning

According to an article I read on USA Today (today) I am very cool and trendy.  I didn’t realize that I was living on the leading edge of change.  Cocooning was coined in 1981 and was used to describe individuals or families that felt more comfortable staying at home and bringing their entertainment to the environment that they can control.  Some examples are:  home swimming pools, large HD televisions for viewing sports events and viewing new movie releases at home instead of going out to venues, and one of the biggest is bringing home the always improving Home Game Systems.

I remember having to take my children to the Arcade at the Mall because the early home systems were so primitive, that blinking lights of different colors represented the football teams on the television screen.  We must not forget the very first video game “Pong,” that was supposed to be a game of tennis.  With that game even I could be a tennis champion.

Recent events such as shootings at theaters, assaults at sporting events, and crimes in general are bringing cocooning to a level now being called Super Cocooning.  Fear was never my driver, although recent events are beginning to make me look like a genius for my choices over the years.  My smallest television screen at home is 55 inches and comes with internet technology.  After all how many trips to the local Cinema will it take to pay for the latest technology?

Two tickets for my wife and me are slightly under $30 dollars at least double that cost if you go to IMAX Theater.  The cost of admission to go to the theater is the inexpensive part of the experience, have you tried eating anything once inside. My wife and I can easily spend $40 to $50 dollars by the time we head home.  The abuse is very obvious, and yet we go for it because we are a captive audience.  A 32 ounce soft drink is usually $4 or $5 dollars (3/4 of the 32 ounce cup is filled with ice that doesn’t cost the theater to produce because they have ice machines).

Sporting events are even more outrageous.  The last time I treated my boys to a football game, it cost me over $500 dollars and that was just the admission.  I didn’t enjoy the game because we were sitting next to some very drunk and obnoxious fans.  With a nice setup at home any sporting event can be much more enjoyable, not to mention the up close shots that professional HD camera work can offer with modern day technological advances.

I mentioned the costs of participating in entertainment of any type outside the home, and yet my biggest concern is the level of enjoyment vs. the safety of my family.  I am not suggesting that we drop out of society, simply that we be aware of options, and always our surroundings.  The best is yet to come....

Tales from the Dark Side Part 4 - Conclusion

Tales from the Dark Side Part 4 - Conclusion

Continued from Part 3

I became ever so cautious as I neared the age of 42.  Life had been so wonderful for us as a family; I dreaded the impending disruption that I had been anticipating for years.  We had purchased our most recent home at the perfect time just as the real estate market was about to take off sky high.  We had invested in a number of properties in Eastern Washington, where real estate was more affordable, we had everything going for us.  Our youngest child was almost 5 years old, and everyone my mother included was enjoying good health.  The only obstacle in the way was a pending (predicted) near death experience.

My birthday in February came and went without even the slightest incident.  The Wednesday before Thanksgiving of that year, I considered that within less than 3 month, I would celebrate my 43^rd  birthday and the prediction would have been a non-event.  Later that same day my wife and I had to go visit one of our regular customers and we decided to make the 18 mile drive at 11 pm rather than take time on Thanksgiving Day.  We always took the option most traveled by taking Broadway past the Mall, this time at the very last minute and for no special reason that I can discern, I took the Boeing Highway 526.  Just past the Evergreen Boulevard underpass is a pedestrian bridge.  I approached it at about 60 miles per hour in my new Dodge Dakota truck. I didn’t see it coming but the person following a short distance behind saw everything.  The witness, a Boeing engineer heading to his office for some last minute paper work prior to leaving for Hawaii the next day for the holiday, saw my near death event.  In the light of his headlights he saw a shadow of a boy or man drop a chunk of concrete on my windshield and run towards Casino Road.

As the splinters of glass flew past my face I could hear the splinters bouncing on the back window of the small truck cab.  I worked desperately to control my truck as it almost lost control and nearly flipped over. My first thought was that I must have hit a pedestrian.  I first checked to see if my wife was alright, and I knew that she was because she was shaking the splinters of glass from her hair and coat.  Right about then the driver following behind me came to my driver’s side window and asked if we were alright.  The first thing he said was that he was afraid to look in the cab because he expected that at least one of us would be dead.  Then his next statement re-assured me that the event I had been anticipating had taken place.  He said, “THIS IS AS CLOSE AS YOU WILL EVER COME TO DYING WITHOUT GETTING HURT.”

The chunk of concrete hit the base of the windshield wiper directly in front of my steering wheel, from there the concrete penetrated the windshield leaving a weird shaped protrusion into the cab about one and a half inches long, and then spun over the cab.  The witness saw where it landed and handed it over to the state Patrol when he arrived within minutes (the engineer had called from his latest gadget a cell phone in a brief case).   The engineer also mentioned that if I had been traveling a few miles faster per hour, the concrete would have gone through the windshield and possibly knocked my head off.

As cautious and prepared as I tried to be, it took me by surprise.  I can’t lie; my whole body was shaking for about two hours afterwards.  I was very happy to be alive and happy to be over my 29 year ordeal.  The best is yet to come…..

Mother vs. Hulk Hogan

Mother vs. Hulk Hogan

 I could give many examples of my wife’s love for me, but none is more significant than when she asked me if we could invite my elderly mother to come and live with us after her divorce from my step-father.  In all honesty I kind of longed for that type of arrangement, but I wasn’t about to impose that on her.  Again showing grace beyond belief she worked out chore responsibilities with my mother to make her not only feel welcomed but also a working part of the family.

My mother having a reputation for being a great master of the kitchen was assigned the chef duties and my wife handled everything else.  I of course was in hog heaven.  I ate the foods I enjoyed growing up, plus I had my whole family under one roof to look after, and provide for.  I’m sorry to say that the arrangement lasted no more than six or seven months.  We began to notice that my wife and I were gaining weight quicker than ever before, so my wife rearranged the duties and mother came out of the kitchen.  To be sure my wife cooked with healthy eating in mind, while my mother just made sure that the food was finger licking good.

My duties now included entertaining my mother and it involved the following, but not limited to: maintaining her in a supply of yarn, and materials for other crafts that she and my wife shared, including embroidery.  All those crafts after a while were not enough so I made the mistake of introducing my mother to Bingo at the local Casino.  We got lucky almost immediately, and before you knew it we were playing bingo on an average of 3 times a week (about two hours per outing).  It didn’t help that we lived less than a couple of miles from a very popular casino.

Another big interest of my mother’s became the WWF (later changed to WWE).  Most all the wrestlers were her favorites, Hulk Hogan, Macho Man “Randy Savage,” Kamala the Butcher, Jake the Snake, on and on.  I actually took my mother to some live wrestling matches at a nearby Domed Arena, and she had the time of her life.  There is a big reason for the build-up on the WWF.

The following year my mother for a short period of time seem to act a little depressed, so I came up with a great idea to bring her out of it.  I contacted my grandmother in California whom my mother had always maintained a close relationship with, and invited her to come to the Northwest and visit for a week.  Due to the fact that my grandmother was already in her 80’s, I also invited my grandmother’s daughter (my only aunt from my father’s side of the family).  After purchasing two round-trip airplane tickets for them, I had to make up a story so my mother would accompany me to the airport without giving away the surprise.

I told my mother that Hulk Hogan and a bunch of other wrestlers including Macho Man, and his manager Ms. Elizabeth, were coming to town for a Main Event, and that they would be arriving by plane at the airport.  I further told her that a friend gave me inside information and that we could go see them arrive and get their autograph.  Mother cheered up at the thought of meeting the Hulk, and Macho Man in person.

Once at the airport, the flight I was expecting (prior to the security restrictions of September 11, 2001), arrived and we were sitting nearby watching everyone come out of the tunnel.  I told mother to keep her eyes focused on the people coming off of the plane.  I was expecting that she would see and recognize my aunt and grandmother, as they entered the terminal.  When I saw them and they saw me, they walked towards and stood right in front of us, but my mother didn’t even notice them.  She was trying to look around them still looking for Hulk Hogan.  I finally said mom look who is here, she was filled with joy and stood up and hug them both, but as soon as she could she turned to me and in a low voice asked me; “Does that mean that Hulk is not coming?”  The following week was the best ever for catching up, adding details to the family tree project, and just plain fun.  That would also be the last time that my mother, grandmother and aunt would visit together.  I guess I did do a good thing after all.  Stay tuned the best is yet to come……

Tales from the Dark Side Part 3

Tales from the Dark Side Part 3

Continued from Part 2

I took my future forecast so serious that before I entered into marriage in 1977, I mention to my bride to be that I had once been told by a Fortune Teller that I would come near death at the age of 42.  We didn’t laugh it off, but we also didn’t let it stop us.  I do remember that it was about that time that I started paying more attention to my horoscope. I don’t place a lot of faith in it but why take a chance.  I didn’t buy lotto if it said that my luck was good, but if it said danger, don’t travel, I stayed home.

As I celebrated my 35^th birthday and beyond, I began to worry more about the prediction, and reaching 42 became worrisome.  I always checked the newspaper Horoscope before leaving the house to make sure that I took adequate precaution based on the forecast.  I worried about such things as; minimizing travel, staying away from airplanes or boats.  I didn’t share my fears with my wife because I didn’t want her to join me in my fears.  I also hoped that she had forgotten about the prediction that I shared with her so many years earlier.

Between the age of 37 and 42 I received thirteen offers for promotion or opportunities to switch employment requiring relocation of myself and family.  I turned every offer down because I wanted to maintain family stability, just in case.  The prediction came close to becoming more of a curse.  I felt that if something was going to happen to my physical body at age 42, I wanted my family to be in familiar surrounding so they could be better able to cope with limited participation from me.

I know that it sounds strange that I would track the number of opportunities that I received starting five years prior to the age of 42. Honestly it was even stranger that the number was 13, which in itself is considered an unlucky number.  Then again I didn’t give much thought to the number because I didn’t expect it to stop there before the big event.  I apologize if I make it sound like I was obsessed, and didn’t have a normal life.  My life has always been happy, and a real joy when spending time with my wife and children.  Only now, many years after the fact can I look back and see the amount of duress I endured as the anticipated date approached.

It’s funny how I can separate the blessing and curse that the prediction placed on me.  Between the age of 13 (when the prediction was made) and the age of 35 when I began to be concerned, I had a devil may care attitude.  During the early part I would take chances, living as if my life and well-being was somehow guaranteed.  Looking back it was irresponsible to live that way, because I could just as easily have survived to the age of 42 in a wheel chair, if I had gotten injured. There again, no regrets, I enjoyed life to the fullest including racing go-carts with nitro powered engines at Laguna Seca near Monterey, California.  Be in the lookout for the conclusion to Tales from the Dark Side Part 4.  Not only do I cheat death but my beautiful wife was by my side!  The best is yet to come….

Larceny in my heart

Larceny in my heart

It is a known fact that we all have larceny in our hearts, at least I’ve heard it said somewhere.  The rumor, if that is all it is, sounds good enough to me for the purpose and title of this posting.

The year was 1963, and summer was the season. A perfect summer day for a drive; I never missed an opportunity to go for a drive in my 1956 Ford Victoria.  I swear I would have lived in that car if only my mother would allow it.  I regularly would ask my mother if she had any errands for me to run, or if she needed to go somewhere so I could drive her there.  The family car was 1962 Plymouth Belvedere Station Wagon with automatic transmission, air condition the whole nine yards as the saying goes.  I enjoyed driving my mother around in it, that is, until I acquired my Ford.

Teenagers didn’t make fun of each other back then for driving the family car even if it was a station wagon.  Besides, this station wagon had a 383 cu. in. V-8 engine that could outrun most anything in town, and I should know.  You could say I was ungrateful to prefer my Ford without air condition during the hot summer days, but trust me when I say that the Glass-Pak Cherry mufflers, more than made up for it.  People could hear me approaching a country mile away, especial that I loved down shifting as I approached stop signs.

But I digress, back to the subject of larceny in my heart.  Before you go off conjuring pictures in your mind of me robbing banks or even gas stations, here is how it went down.  I had a step-brother two years younger than me, and he loved riding around with me.  You can bet that my mother influenced his love for riding around with me.  He was supposed to keep me out of trouble, not to mention tell on me if I didn’t do everything by the rules.

On a beautiful day in June a week prior to the start of cherry harvest my brother and I drove into town to get haircuts.  We also stopped at Western Auto buy leather gloves and couple of straw hats, to ward of the hot summer sun while working outdoors.  Of course we also made a stop at A & W for a grilled ham and cheese sandwich with a frosted large glass of root beer (still my all-time favorite).  On the drive home (we lived 15 miles out of town) is when the dastardly deed took place.

We were driving along the beautiful country roads among the open fields of alfalfa, mint and cherry orchards, admiring the ready to be picked plump purplish red cherries.  I suddenly decided that we should pick a few to eat as we drove home.  My little brother and I pulled to the shoulder of the road and went a few yards into the orchard to pick a handful of cherries.  As we came out of the orchard with my brother holding as many cherries, as he could put in his tee-shirt, which he folded up like a pouch in front of him, we were apprehended. 

Apprehended is an exaggeration; we actually came into the open to find a Sherriff’s Patrol Unit parked behind my car.  We were ready to drop the loot but he told us there was no sense in wasting the fruit, so he allowed us to keep it.  He continued to lecture us about how the farmer wouldn’t be able to make a living if everyone that drove by could just stop and pick some fruit.  As he instructed us to get in our car and go home, he mentioned that he knew our older brother, and would tell him about the incident the next time he saw him.

We learned our lesson, and never again took anything that didn’t belong to us.  We became very appreciative of law enforcement, and probably kept us from bigger jobs like robbing banks.  Our older brother never mentioned it to us, so it was probably just a scare tactic (that worked well).  The best is yet to come…..

Tales from the Dark Side Part 2

Tales from the Dark Side Part 2

Continued from Part 1

We went to her trailer where I was asked to seat across from her at a small round table.  She grabbed my right hand and turned it palm side up, where upon she immediately started to trace what she called my life line.  I remember staring at her face, not only for the obvious reason that she was beautiful, but as much for the fact that she had a very serious look on her face.  I felt a sense of imminent life changing information about to be disclosed about my future.  There again what could be so important about a 13 year Old’s life? 

As she continued to stare at the palm of my hand she traced the lifeline across my palm with the index finger of her right hand.  She was telling me and my company (Brother, and his wife) that my life would be uneventful growing up, that I would achieve a high level of happiness, success, and wealth, until a point at the age of 42 when I come very close to dying.  She re-assured me that I would not die, and would live a nice long life.  My brother asked her why she felt that she had to read my fortune, and she couldn’t explain it; she only said that she felt compelled to inform me.

I didn’t much sleep that night, but it was probably as much from the impression her beauty made on me than the message she shared.  However, I confess that her message haunted me for the rest of my life; obviously even though I am alive past 42, it’s still fresh on my mind.

Through the years, I’ve heard people smarter than me say that they are happy not knowing when their last day on earth will be, for obvious reasons.  I did, however, have enough faith in her message to feel relief in knowing that I would live to at least 42 years of age.  What bothered me was that coming near death for me always meant that I would end up brain dead or on a wheel chair for the duration of life.

In retrospect, I wish that I had somehow stayed in touch with that lady, because her message and image sure stayed in my mind until now.  Looking back at my life I can say with a degree of certainty that the Fortune Teller Lady had a real gift.  I went on in my youth to race cars, motorcycles, go carts, and take other chances feeling pretty much invincible because I knew that I would survive until age 42.

I took my future forecast so serious that before I entered into marriage in 1977, I mention to my bride to be that I had once been told by a Fortune Teller that I would come near death at the age of 42.  We didn’t laugh it off, but we also didn’t let it stop us.  I do remember that it was about that time that I started paying more attention to my horoscope. I don’t place a lot of faith in it but why take a chance.  I didn’t buy lotto if it said that my luck was good, but if it said danger, don’t travel, I stayed home.  Keep a look out for Tales from the Dark Side Part 3!  The best is yet to come….

Tribute to mom

Classic Beauty

My mother’s mission in life was to make sure that her children had a better life than she herself had.  During her life, my mother was married twice.  Once for love; my father was the love of her life, even though her marriage to my father only lasted 13 actual years, she loved him until the day she took her last breath.  The second time she married was to provide a real family environment to me and my little sister.  For a three years (between marriages) she was a single head of household, and maintained two jobs at times three jobs just to meet all of our needs, and many wants.  Her second husband loved her very much and she loved him, their marriage lasted about 24 years.

February 15^th will always be a special day in my life.  On this day 92 years ago my mother was born.  My mother passed away in 1999, but not before she got to see her son (me) reach the level of success she wanted for me.  I adored her than as I do now, and I know that I made her proud.

At some point in life she stopped being my mother, and crossed over into being my biggest fan.  To this day I don’t know what it’s like to get in trouble with any kind of addiction, or be in trouble with the law.  All my efforts throughout life have been to make my mother proud, and I know that she was.  Every time we visited or talked on the telephone, the conversation ended with, “God Bless You Son.”  I know that all my life I’ve been blessed because she prayed for me, and today I am blessed because she looks over me!  I love you mother!!  The best is yet to come……….

Tales from the Dark Side Part 1

Tales from the Dark Side Part 1

 I’ve already established in previous posts that I loved, and looked up to my step-brother and his wife ever since I met them upon arriving in Washington State.  In trying to figure out the reason why I liked them so much, I can come up with one that is definitely a good argument.  Up until I met him, I pretty much went everywhere and anywhere either alone or with my parents.  Alone was always played safe, and with my parents, it was mostly boring (running errands, etc.).  My mother and step father were very nice and loving people in a parent way, but not very exciting.

While the above is a good argument, the real reason I settled on is that they were young and adventurous.  They did all the things that my parents thought were risky or foolish.  My brother loved firearms, and he had a nice collection; 30-30 over/under Winchester, a couple of 22 pump rifles and 3- 22 caliber handguns, a 20 gage and a 12 gage shotguns.  The best part about this wonderful couple; they loved taking me with them everywhere.  We would go swimming, hunting, camping, horseback riding, target practicing, and regularly to car races.

At the age of thirteen my brother and his wife invited me to a carnival at the annual Rodeo and Pow-Wow.  We were having a blast and were almost ready to go home when we decided to make one last walk through the carnival promenade.  As we walked past a group of small mobile trailers a beautiful young woman was standing at the doorway of the Fortune Teller trailer, and I made the mistake (this is Monday morning quarter-backing, talking) of making eye contact.  She signaled me to come to her but I kept walking behind my brother and sister in-law, as we passed by. 

After going past her trailer about 30 feet I suddenly felt my hand being grabbed and tugged at.  I turned around and was surprised to see the beautiful young lady was trying to get me to go with her to her Fortune Teller trailer. Trust me I know it sounds bad, a 13 year old being lured by a beautiful young woman (Gipsy woman no less), but this story is a lot more serious, as you will eventually come to find out.

The slight commotion got the attention of my brother and his wife who were amused to see a woman pulling on my arm.  He asked her what was going on.  Her response was that she had something important to tell me about my future.  My brother asked how much she charged and she said a dollar but I won’t charge him anything.  My brother being the adult and in charge said, let’s see what the future holds for you, it’s not even going to cost anything.

We went to her trailer where I was asked to seat across from her at a small round table.  She grabbed my right hand and turned it palm side up, where upon she immediately started to trace what she called my life line.  I remember staring at her face, not only for the obvious reason that she was beautiful, but as much for the fact that she had a very serious look on her face.  I felt a sense of imminent life changing information about to be disclosed about my future.  There again what could be so important about a 13 year Old’s life?  Please keep a look out for Tales from the Dark side Part 2.  The best is yet to come….

Remember When

Remember When

 Soon after my wife and I got married in 1977 (6 months to be exact) I received two great money making opportunities (great examples of opening the door when opportunity knocks) One was a job as head of a non-profit organization and the other to be the Spanish voice of a northwest product that was entering its centennial celebration.  The latter was a constant money source in the way of a monthly retainer fee to keep me under contract and to be used as needed.  Both went a long ways to make our lives (new start) a lot easier.

 I’m not bragging about the money, although it was more blessing than I was used to.  In order to take advantage of the opportunities we had to pack our belongings and move across the Cascades to the West side of the state.  We discussed it only briefly, and decided it was what we both wanted to do.  I still remember having to go to work every morning and leaving my new bride at home without any relatives nearby.  But to be sure I was just as lonely at work.  I was surrounded by staff that I was responsible for, and board members that I was responsible to, and yet they were all new in my life. 

 I couldn’t wait to go home and be with someone that I knew had my back, and I could relax around.  I knew my wife also looked forward to the end of the day so we could stand back to back against the world.  Eventually the babies started arriving and the family grew, into exactly what we both wanted.  I loved it when my babies were young only because I could be in total control of their safety, their needs, in general and their happiness.

Progress is one of the requirements of life.  I’m sure you’ve heard the saying that, “time waits for no-one.”  You need to put things in perspective in order to get the most out of life.  To get to where you need to be, some things will need to change.  While change is inevitable, it’s not always welcomed.  My babies grew up and went through the school system, and now they are scattered all over the State.  I have three in the Eastern Washington and 4 in Western Washington.  I’ve been told by friends that I stopped to soon; cause if I’d had only 5 more I would qualify for my own Casino.

 There comes a time in the progression cycle where we find ourselves caught between raising our children, and helping our aging parents.  Been there done that.  I never complained, and my wife has always been a great partner, she stood side by side with me and shouldered her share of the load.  I won’t say fair share because at the time it was my parents that I was dealing with, and she was gracious and helped me get past it.

Our babies are all grown up, and some have babies of their own.   I guess you could say that, that is the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow.  Along the way and at different times a couple of my children have told me that when they grow up, they are going to take care of us.  I always give the same answer; if you just grow up to take care of yourself, I will take care of your mother and myself (so far-so good).  I can’t say my life is perfect, because I don’t know what a perfect life is like, but I can say that I wouldn’t change anything if I could start over.  The only other thing I can say is that the best is yet to come….