Secret Sauce

 

Man's Life Stages

Making the most of life is always important but never as important as when you near your Golden Years.  I refer to this post as Man's Life Stages only because it's being shared by me and obviously a man's perspective.  Having said that, all I share will also apply to a person of the opposite gender.  

Three Measures

For the purpose of this post, I will use three measures on every Stage of Life, and they are: Time, Money, and Energy.

• First Stage - Youth: Many young men during their high school years and some even into college have plenty of time and energy but minimal money.  

1. Without a doubt, most often by choice or circumstance.  Their values and priorities have yet to be developed.  I on the other hand had my very first successful business at the age of 10.  Some might say I was lucky, however, Luck is what happens when preparation meets opportunity.  
2. I'm sure that multitasking has been around for a long time, I can't remember a time when I didn't have at least 3 or 4 things going on at the same time.  I would even go as far as to say that the common problem is lacking motivation, and thus lacking money.

• Second Stage - Adult: Young adults by now for the most part have completed college or entered the work force, started a business and/or are working their way up the corporate ladder. Some maybe even have gotten married and are raising a family.  All of a sudden they find themselves (hopefully) with plenty of money, and energy (still young) but no time. 

1. It doesn't have to be as describes but I'll guess that a sampling would show approximately 90% as described.
2. This stage of life is a time when many relationships get stressed to the breaking point.  If you don't have a strategy and great partner to help you through it, you may run into some tough challenges.  Managing your limited time is crucial.  My wife and I had 4 children, and I was fortunate that she wanted to be a stay at home mom until all the children were attending school full time. In the meantime she was involved in our family business which didn't impose a stringent work schedule on her. 

• Third Stage - Old: If you worked smart and diligently had some good luck, and kept all the chainsaws you were juggling up in the air, you should find yourself with lots of time, ample money, but low on energy.

1. Hopefully you made your money for retirement and made some wise investment choices before you ran low on energy.  I've always said that in life I took some risks based on knowing that if I failed I had enough time to recover the losses.
2. However, at some point in my age progressions I started playing it safe.

And now for the Secret Sauce:  There is one element that can make all the difference in the world at every one of the 3 stages especially the third one.  I'm sure we have all heard someone say, "if only I had known I was going to live this long, I would have taken better care of myself."  We don't all have the blessings of good genes, or healthy habits plus a great life partner who keeps us on the straight and narrow to better life choices.

If you already missed the train to good health in your golden years, then you must share this and other similar articles with your children so they don't end up finding out at a later time in life.  As always, I make the claim that I am healthy, happy and blessed.  I still have enough energy to be working, even if I really don't have to (because I am retired).  I still enjoy long road trips in which I do all the driving by choice.  I have many interests and I stay mobile and involved.  Remember: If you don't get of the couch while you can, you won't be able to get off when you have to.  The best is yet to come.....

Never Again

Never Again

God knows I've lived long enough to earn the right to say, "Now I've seen everything!"  Somewhere along the way, and until recently, I'm very sure there was nothing left out there to surprise me or better yet shock me.

Enter the pandemic.  I had experience in my life time (not affected or infected): Tuberculosis, Polio, Whooping Cough, Cholera, HIV, Cancer, etc., etc., etc. I never thought that I would see a time where the whole world human race would be affected at the same time.  I had never seen or expected to see a situation where all the schools in the country would be closed down.  Businesses would be shut down, the population would be asked to stay home, and/or wear masks.

Twin Towers Memorial

I remember right after 911 and the terrorist attack on the Twin Towers (New York), the whole country's air travel was shut down.  It was eerie to to look up at the night sky and not see any air traffic (navigational lights blinking).  One of my sons got caught up in the travel industry shut down. I was going to say that he got stuck, thought better of it because he got stranded (not) in Hawaii. Lucky dog, although I must admit at the time, it must having been scary not knowing when you could get back home, or if the homeland was at war and continued attack. The whole situation with 911 terrorist attack was one of those instances where even with all my life experience, I didn't see it coming.

One of those nights, right after the Twin Tower attack, I was in my home office getting some work done and to my shock, I heard a single engine plane approaching the vicinity of my residence and quickly fly very low overhead.  My first thought was the pilot was flying under the radar, my second thought was, if our Air Force is as good as I think it is, there should be some military jets close behind in hot pursuit. I don't think the thought cleared my mind, when I heard the high pitch whine of a couple of jet fighters in pursuit.

Homeland Protector

The pandemic has introduced me to many first time experiences.  I could never imagine over 900,000 Covid 19 Deaths in the United States to date (as of this writing).  After all this time in my wonderful life I hadn't lost very many of my friends and relatives.  Now, in the first 6 months of 2021, I have lost more friends and relatives than I have in my whole life. Education has been shut down to in person participation for about a year and a half.  I never thought that would ever happen.  Many friends and relatives have lost the ability to support their families because of the Vaccine Mandate. I won't make my choice known because I believe that individuals have the right to make up their own decisions and I wouldn't want to begin to influence anyone. I've always expressed that my opinions are exactly that, and no influence is intended.

I sincerely hope that all my readers are surviving the pandemic, and even thriving if possible.  As usual I make the claim that I and my immediate family are happy, healthy and blessed.  I wish I could tell you that normal is just around the corner, but to be very honest with you, I'm not even sure that we will recognize normal when it arrives.

I'll gladly add a positive note to this post.  In my entire life (and I am presently retired) I have never made a job move that wasn't for the better.  So for any of you that are being manipulated out of your career, just know that better days are ahead of you. Take every precaution that you deem necessary to keep you and yours safe, don't pay any attention to the haters, you do you.  The best is yet to come....

The Silver Lining

The Silver Lining

For as long as I can remember, I’ve always found the Silver Lining on all situations no matter how dire they may be.  If we believe in the All mighty, then we must believe that he wouldn’t paint us into a corner.  No matter what he throws at us, we always have free agency (the ability to make choices).  We can choose between, good and bad or bad and worse, and even good and better.

Whenever I find myself in a less than positive situation (not often) I try to figure out what it is that I can do to improve it or even turn it into a total positive.

I won’t bother you with all the details because right now, even I don’t have all the information that is being generated on my behalf.

I won’t tell you my exact age, because if I did, I may have to do away with you (LOL) but suffice to know that even I am amazed at how great of a life I’ve had and how healthy I’ve been.  I was beginning to think that some day I could just drop dead and people would say but he was so healthy.

Four months ago, I went to the doctor’s office for something totally unrelated to what I’m presently dealing with right now.  My regular physician was not available because I came in with a last-minute appointment, so another physician saw me and during the course of regular examination discovered that I had a heart murmur.  She asked me how long I had the murmur.  I explained that I wasn’t aware of any murmurs.

Since then and in short order, I’ve talked to a cardiologist twice, and a couple of heart surgeons.  I’ve had 3 different tests that help determine that I am strong and healthy not yet showing symptoms but definitely need to take action, if I want to take control of my life, literally.

I’ve said it before and will repeat it again and again.  In life there are two people that you need to stay in contact with (communicate), your doctor, and the Internal revenue agent.  No particular order.

Before I cause any damage to my heart, I need to act, the sooner the better.  As I’ve mentioned before, we have free agency (we can make choices).  I can elect to ignore the problem and ruin my quality of life (maybe even be gone within 4 to five years); I can elect the least intrusive and painful way (shorter history to go by).  I have consulted with my wife and selected the more intrusive way, more painful and longest recovery period.  My selection also has a history dating back to the 1950’s with much better odds of success and longevity.

I’m sharing my situation on this blog for two main reasons: 1- I asked family and friends for prayers without an explanation.  I feel that those that offered prayers deserve a thank you and an explanation. 2- I want every person that follows my blog and FB Page to take care of themselves and listen to their body and medical professionals.  For those of you that are in my age range (whatever that might be), life is even more precious than ever.  I will keep you posted on my progress.  Thank you for your thoughts and prayers.  Stay positive always. I know that the best is yet to come….

Time for Reflection

Time for Reflection

What does it mean to take time to reflect?

Taking time to reflect means slowing down enough to stop, enjoy the adventure and figure out what is really important to YOU. Learn what you like and dislike. Do something for fun… for you.

Is it possible to be too smart for your own good?  My answer at this point in my life is, without a doubt.  For some of us, questioning ourselves is unthinkable because it may show a kink in the armor.  All my life I have been so sure of myself that to begin to question my life’s decisions, might show some level of weakness or failure.

However, life has taught me so much, that to reflect on my life periodically is actually a sign of maturity and strength.  In life’s journey we are like a ship at sea.  Just like a ship is affected by the elements, and ocean’s currents, so our lives are affected by things that we are aware of and many that blindside us.  Navigational adjustment is a requirement to arrive at our planned destinations.

Most recently, I have stayed away from posting on this blog because I was in search of me.  Fortunately, one of my discoveries is that I do enjoy writing and sharing my thoughts with you (my readers).  I’ve been contacted by some readers, asking me if everything is alright.  Thank you for asking, I can answer that I’ve never been better.  I am reminded of a dear friend (no longer with us) that used to say, “I’m in great shape, for the shape I’m in!”

Imagine for a moment that I climbed a mountain for the mere purpose of meditating and seeing the world from a different perspective.

In the process, I’ve completed some items from my bucket list. What?  You don’t have one?  Everyone needs a Bucket List!  It doesn’t have to be “the end of Life Bucket List.”

My definition of a bucket list is, a list of items that need to be given priority to track and complete timely (you set the timeline).   See my post on Bucket List:  http://www.being50.com/2013/02/making-bucket-list.html

 My most recent Reflection time has created some unexpected actions in my life going forward.  I have arrived at conclusions and new directions that surprised me (the very person in charge of my journey with God’s Blessings).  Never forget that Choices and Consequences are a package deal.  When making choices keep in mind the possible consequences (otherwise known as paying the Piper).  The best is yet to come……..

Lessons Learned

Lessons Learned

10 Shocking Statistics About Elderly Falls

·        When an elderly person falls, their hospital stays are almost twice longer than those of     elderly patients who are admitted for any other reason.

·        The risk of falling increases with age and is greater for women than men.

·        Annually, falls are reported by one-third of all people over the age of 65.

·        Two-thirds of those who fall will do so again within six months.

·        Falls are the leading cause of death from injury among people 65 and older.

·        Approximately 9,500 deaths in older Americans are associated with falls each year.

·        More than half of all fatal falls involve people 75 or over.

·        Among people aged 65 to 69, one out of every 200 falls results in a hip fracture. That number increases to one out of every 10 for those aged 85 and older.

·        One-fourth of seniors who fracture a hip from a fall will die within six months of the injury.

·        The most profound effect of falling is the loss of functioning associated with independent living.  ~ by Shell Point Retirement Community

CAUTION!  Don’t try this at home.  At some point, we all reach and cross the line where we are old enough to know better.  That line can be reached through personal experience, common sense, or by someone else’s example.  However, you do reach it, we all must reach it.  I love learning from other’s mistakes because it saves me a lot of pain and suffering.  Not to mention that it makes me look mature and smart.

As I get older, I’ve noticed that every so often I catch myself pushing the envelope.  I am not sure that I am trying to prove that “I still got it,” or perhaps trying to save time.  Since I am retired, I can’t blame my corner cutting on time constraint. 

Just a short list:  I have survived the following unhurt, almost got electrocuted running electrical wire for an addition to our home; survived a rear collision on a vehicle wreck where my car was standing still and the other driver was traveling at approximately 50 mph (should have killed me but it only resulted in a broken back) (I know, I make it sound like a piece of cake).  I almost drowned while swimming with friends in a river at age 11 (I actually went under for the count); I was painting the trim on the exterior of my house while standing on the very top rung of an 8-foot ladder (a wind gust came up and I almost lost my balance), I quickly came to my senses and I called a professional to finish the job.

They say the road to hell is paved with good intentions.  Well, my wife and I have spent perhaps thousands of dollars over the years in an effort to stay healthy through exercise (gym memberships).  My most recent effort is to transform our large garage into a gym.  We purchased 5 professional workout pieces of equipment, and a hot sauna to complete the ideal workout place.  And now the rest of the story:  No work out place is complete without a descent size screen television to take your mind away from the pain and suffering of a healthy workout.  I was trying to place the tv on top of the sauna but it was about a half inch too big to fit. From on top of the ladder about 4 feet high, I was holding the tv and tried to place it on top a shelf about 30 inches away.  Bottom line is I lost my balance and went backwards from the ladder while still holding the television.  I protected the investment on the tv set keeping it at arm’s length as I went down backwards.  Fortunately, on the way down my elbow knocked over a stack of walk-in carpets that miraculously landed under me and cushioned my fall.

All’s well that ends well, but once again, someone was looking out after me, and I came out unhurt.  I surveyed the area where I landed it, and still don’t know how those carpets ended up under me.  I came within inches of hitting my head on at least three very sharp corners, any of which could have killed me.

I beg you to be very careful in your own personal lives.  If you believe that you can’t afford to have a professional handle your project, ask yourself if you can afford time in the hospital and the medical bills or worst.  I hereby promise to draw on my experience, and the mistakes of others to keep myself safe for my family and friends.  The best is yet to come……..

Losing Its Luster

Losing Its Luster

Luster

Noun                                                                    A position of exalted widely recognized importance:    distinction, eminence, eminency, fame, glory, illustriousness, mark, notability, note, preeminence, prestige, prominence, prominency, renown.

Luster is one word that I could think of to describe the level of importance to certain holidays growing up.  Consider that the holidays have remained pretty much unchanged, but in our eyes and mind (which have matured) the holidays are losing their luster.

I totally love all holidays, but number one and number two have to be Christmas and Thanksgiving.  Occupying third place would have to be Memorial Day.  Memorial Day has different relevance to a multitude of people for different reasons:  1) a day designated for remembrance of loved ones that have gone ahead of us, 2) a day to celebrate and recognize and honor our military heroes that made the ultimate sacrifice, 3) of great importance to young people in high school and college; the signal to the beginning of Summer and start of school vacation.  Secondary but also important are the wonderful family and friend get togethers for BBQ’s, and just plain ole catching up.

I still remember being young and looking forward to bed time on Christmas eve, because I knew that by Christmas morning Santa would have come by and left me some presents.  My parents always managed to surprise me and exceed my expectations. 

I can only think of one Christmas when it almost ended up being a total disaster, but instead turned out to be the most memorable Christmas ever.  Check out the post:  Unexpected Best Christmas, http://www.being50.com/2013/06/unexpected-best-christmas.html

I wish I could tell you at what age I stopped believing in Santa Claus, but I honestly don’t remember.  I do know that I had my suspicions about whether he was real or not for a few years, but I didn’t dare not believe, just in case.  After that holiday lost its luster for me, it wasn’t until, I was a married young adult with children before I started to enjoy seeing the same look of amazement in the little faces of my children.

Now, once again the clock keeps ticking, and my babies are now adults with children of their own.  In recent years that same look of amazement can now be seen in the little faces of my grandchildren.  The luster of the holiday is never lost it just gets passed on from generation to generation.  It’s up to people like you and me, to continue to encourage it and keep it alive.  You could even say that as grandparents we would do well to look at Christmas through the eyes of our grandchildren and great grandchildren.  The best is yet to come……..

Cause for Concern

Wes Craven 1939-2015

I don’t necessarily feel that this is a trend that we should worry about, but we should certainly at least stop and see what’s going on.  During the last week of August (August 29^th and 30^th to be exact) two very popular and loved icons died in what I consider to be, way too young.

·       Wes Craven (8/02/1939 to 8/30/2015), the famed maestro of horror known for the Nightmare on Elm Street and Scream Franchises, died Sunday after a battle with brain cancer.  He was 76. 

·       Craven, whose iconic Freddy Krueger character horrified viewers for years, died at his home in Los Angeles, his family announced.  Survivors include his wife, producer and former Disney Studios vice president Iva Labunka.

Wayne Walter Dyer 1940-2015

• Wayne Walter Dyer (5/10/1940 to 8/29/2015) was an American self-help author and motivational speaker. His first book Your Erroneous Zones is one of the best-selling books of all time, with an estimated 35 million copies sold. ~ Wikipedia
• Dyer was diagnosed with chronic lymphocytic leukemia in 2009 but claimed to have treated it with positive thinking, daily exercise and "psychic surgery" performed remotely by the Brazilian medium João Teixeira de Faria, better known as "John of God." He detailed the controversial treatment in an interview with Oprah Winfrey — for whom he was a friend and frequent guest for more than 30 years — in 2012.

We can hopefully take this as a sign that we need to stay current on our personal and loved one’s health.  Some illnesses are avoidable and/or treatable others that are terminal may allow us additional time with loved ones if we become aware early enough.

I’ve said it before there are two professionals in our lives that we would do well to communicate with, our health care providers and the Internal Revenue Service.  In these two instances no surprises is good policy.  Rest In Peace to the two fine gentlemen that we just lost.  The best is yet to come……

May - December Romance

May - December Romance

I was recently reading some articles on romances where the couples, whether married or not are at least separated by 10 years in age.  I did get the logic of calling any romance separated by 10 years or more “May –December.”  However, since we are using months to show the age of the individuals in the relationship and life expectancy in Washington State for males is 77.77, and 82 years for females, for the sake of easy calculation lets average the two to 80 years of age.

Having setup the formula first, now we can say that if the male is the older in the relationship and 80 is the life expectancy that would make December 31st, equal to 80 years of age. So the young female at the May month would be somewhere approximately in her mid-30’s, that would take the romance out of the May – December Romance moniker. A couple where the bride is 36 and the groom is between 73 and 80 sounds more like a nurse – patient relationship.  I hate to say it because I grew up reading Playboy for the articles (of course), but it sounds like a marriage that could only take place (regularly) at the Playboy Mansion.

Pinky Promise

• May-December relationships have at least an 11-year age span between the parties. The vast majority of May-December marriages take place between older men and younger women. According to the most recent U.S. census, 7.4 percent of husbands are 10 or more years older than their wives.
• But that trend is starting to change. A 2003 AARP report, “Lifestyles, Dating and Romance,” found that 8 percent of women older than 39 were dating men at least 10 years younger.
• Hollywood has long been a breeding ground for May-December romances. Charlie Chaplin famously wed Oona O’Neill when she was 18 and he was 54. Warren Beatty is 21 years older than his wife, Annette Bening. Harrison Ford, 70, is married to Calista Flockhart, 48. Clint Eastwood is 82; wife Dina Ruiz-Eastwood is 35 years younger (they’re getting a divorce).
• Why choose a partner from a vastly different age group? Research conducted at University of Gothenburg and Oxford University and published in the journal Evolutionary Psychology found that women wanted older men because of their solid financial resources and high social status. Men have always sought younger female partners.The study also found that the majority of women older than 60 were looking for younger men.
• While many May-December couples report they’ve found the love of their life, they’re likely to encounter certain challenges. They may grapple with an imbalance of power. When one party has more life experience, money and prestige, he or she may exert more authority over the other.
• Partners age at different rates. No matter how youthful the older person feels or acts, the calendar inevitably catches up. ~ BY LINDA LEWIS GRIFFITH 

I can tell you from my fairy tale romance (life), that the first time I saw my wife I was struck by her physical beauty, the fact that she was in college said volumes about her intelligence, and the minute she spoke I was amazed at her maturity beyond her obvious youth.  The chance meeting took place at my office where I was a college counselor (not the same college where she was enrolled).  She had dropped by to take her brother to lunch, and her brother was in a meeting with me in my office, he was a co-worker and also a counselor (to this day we are related and great friends).

To make a very long and loving story short, that beautiful woman that walked into my life unexpectedly on her 18^th birthday, and I married two weeks later.  We just celebrated our most recent anniversary last month (our youngest daughter is 30 years old and we have 3 other children together).  Today I am retired (early retirement), and she enjoys her career she plans to keep working a little longer.  Little did I know that I would go from being the more experience partner in the relationship to being a “kept man.”  I love my life and my present status and for the record I consider our romance a March – May Romance!  The best is yet to come……..

State of the Nation 2

State of the Nation 2

Never want to upstage someone as important as the leader of the free world.  I only mean that in the sense of posting my perspective of where the Nation is at, following his State of the Union speech.

• Every once in a while aging does come with benefits:  knowing from experience what to expect with regard to a pep talk (which a State of the Union speech is meant to be).  When you hear enough of this speeches and then live through the period of time that follows you learn to read between the lines. 
• I would be the last person to say that a politician lies but they do embellish, and you have to give them credit, they are optimistic about how they can improve things with their plans for us.
• If you want to get a real feeling for how the nation is doing you should consider that not everyone is affected in the same exact way at the same exact time by prevailing conditions, political or otherwise. 
• I’ve always measure improvements by getting it down to the lowest common denominator.  First of all, how am I (my home) doing since the last State of the Union speech?  The next level might be to access the status of your job or business.  The next most important measure to an individual should be, the family.  How are your children doing?  How are your brothers and sisters doing?  How about your parents:  the ones that can least afford a negative condition in the state of the nation. 
• Before you counter; some of our elderly that have had a nice life may actually be in better shape economically to withstand a temporary downturn in the economy.  However, generally speaking elderly population with a fixed incomes have limited ability to withstand even temporary downturns.
• Now for the tools to measure how we are doing.  Take a look at the property tax statement for your home if you are one of the fortunate people to own or to be buying your home.  You can usually see a comparison from your past property valuation to your next increase or decrease in valuation, and taxes due.  Take a look at your bank account is your savings stable or has it been declining?  Check your credit card balances are your credit card balances down or up? 
• Certain things affect us all equally, as an example the unusually cold weather we are experiencing in parts of the nation.  According to some news reports utility bills are doubling in some areas because of the extreme and prolonged cold weather.  If your personal situation is stable, you should be able to withstand the fluctuation in your utility bills, but if you are not doing well, it could be the difference between buying groceries and keeping warm.

The next time you hear a politician discuss how the government is going to provide the free anything (in this case 2 years of community college) ask yourself where, is the money coming from.  If you can’t make a logical conclusion just look in the mirror (we the people are the government).

Here is a perfect example of government salesmanship and misinformation that our grandchildren will still be paying for in their lifetime: 

• The Bush administration estimated the war would cost $50 to $60 billion, including the costs of reconstruction and clean up. As of 2013, the Cost of War Project estimates the war has cost $1.7 trillion—nearly 30 times the pre-war estimate. That cost doesn't factor in future costs of veterans' care, which push the total to more than $2.1 trillion. The Veterans Administration spending related to Iraq—which totals $45 billion—is almost as much as the Bush administration's overall cost estimate.  ~U.S News & World Reports ~Seth Cline

It turns out that I am not reporting the State of the Nation, instead I am giving you some ideas on how to evaluate on your own.  Having read State of the Nation post, how are you and yours doing?  The best is yet to come……