Plan For Confrontation

I was raised in a small rural community where everyone knew each other, house and car doors were seldom locked. In the event of a family emergency, all neighbors came together and to the rescue. You did not need government assistance and seldom depended on the church for assistance other than spiritual.

From the days of those memories in my youth to present time, our society has been in a steady decline. Many of the mystery crime stories on television are about murder, armed robbery, sexual assault, home invasion, drugs, and human trafficking. White Collar crime is tolerable by comparison. Please forgive me, I am being facetious.

I am writing this post because of an incident that occurred recently in my personal life. I have a habit of waking a couple of times during the night to get a drink of water. Approximately three days ago I woke up soon after 3 in the morning and as I reached for my bottled water, I thought I was still asleep when I heard muffled voices in our family room or on our backyard deck.

Instinctively I looked for my wife to make sure that she was still in bed asleep. Next, I concentrated to make sure of what I was hearing. Since we only have the two of us in the house, and two puppies 8 months old, any extra voices are cause for alarm.

I had to make an executive decision on the spot, and I did. I decided not to wake my wife because I wanted her to stay safe in the bedroom while I dealt with what I was almost certain would be a confrontation. As preparation for a confrontation goes, I have always maintained a baseball bat by my side of the bed.  On this occasion, we had been doing some end of year cleaning and I had been breaking down cardboard boxes for recycling, so I just happen to have a box opener handy.

I went down the hall without turning the lights on, prepared to have the element of surprise on my side. So once again, I come through without a scratch and the opportunity to gain experience, a lesson for future use and to share. As I rounded the corner into the family room, I saw that the television had been turned on, and that was the source of the voices.  We have had power outages in the area, and some dimming of lights without an electrical outage (culprit). I checked all the windows and doors to secure the house.

Two days after the incident I decided to discuss it with my wife and asked for her input. The bottom line is that we now have a plan in place. She wants me to wake her up so that she can call 911 if necessary.

If you do not presently have a plan in place, please develop one, and be sure to discuss it with other members of your household. You cannot imagine how many times I have heard people say, “That has never happened in our neighborhood before.

Someone once said, “By failing to prepare, you are preparing to fail.”  Be safe in the New Year. The best is yet to come…

Enough is Enough

Social Misfit

Unacceptable Public (Social) Behavior

• Rudeness (also called impudence or effrontery) is a display of disrespect by not complying with the social norms or etiquette of a group or culture. These laws have been established as the essential boundaries of normally accepted behavior. To be unable or unwilling to align one's behavior with these laws known to the general population of what is socially acceptable is to be rude.
• Rudeness "constituted by deviation from whatever counts as politic in a given social context, is inherently confrontational and disruptive to social equilibrium" (Kasper, 1990, p. 208). Rudeness, particularly with respect to speech, is necessarily confrontational at its core.
• Forms of rudeness include acting inconsiderate, insensitive, deliberately offensive, and impolite, a faux pas, obscenity, profanity and violating taboos such as deviancy. In some cases, an act of rudeness can go so far as to be a crime, for example, the crime of hate speech.

There is no place for rudeness

This year unlike other recent years I have at least doubled the number of road trips that we have taken in only the first 6 months.  My wife and I have always made our home so enjoyable that even when we travel we can’t wait to get back home.  I know and few people will argue that our society is headed on a death spiral.  By that, I mean that the quality of manners in our society is quickly becoming almost non-existent.  Those of us that benefited by parents and grandparents that cared and gave us a proper upbringing usually ignore rude behavior because of our very own proper manners.

In a recent weekend my wife and I were on an unplanned road trip and surprise visit to relatives across the State.  Everything had been a happy and satisfying experience, until we decided to make an unscheduled stop at a fast food restaurant for a pit-stop (read restroom break).  Because I was brought up not to take something for nothing, we decided to buy something so as to be fair.  I was standing in line and there was what appeared to be a kindly white hair old gentleman behind me.

As I usually do with strangers, I turned around and asked him how his day was going, and he replied just fine thank you.  I remember thinking what a nice fella, but within minutes the real evil man that he was stepped out of the old carcass.  He ordered from the cash register next to the one I was placing my order, and I remember listening in on his order.  He ordered a basic sandwich with nothing to drink.  Yet when his order came he started yelling that the order didn’t include his chocolate milk.  The employee, explained that he (the customer) had not ordered anything to drink. 

The old man kept raising his voice and asking for the employee to get him his chocolate milk and to give him coupons for three free meals.  When the employee wouldn’t comply, the old man asked to talk to the manager, and get me my three free meal coupons.  The employee responded that he was the manager.  The old man started making racial slurs (the manager was a minority, and customer wasn’t), and saying he was going to call the district manager to complain.  By now the manager was really being accosted by this mean spirited customer who obviously had an agenda when he walked into the restaurant. 

While this confusing scene was developing, the customer took his order and a large bag that had just been placed on the counter filled with another customer’s order.  The horrible customer kept yelling as he made his way to the door.  I heard the manager say what are you doing? Now you are going to steal someone else’s food! The place was filled with traveler type customers that were obviously of parent and grandparent age.  The look of disbelief was on every single person’s face.  One customer finally yelled at the customer (crook), “way to go man, I suppose you are proud of yourself!”  As the customer/crook was almost out the door, he responded, “Shut up and mind your own business.”  I chimed in while he could still here me, “Way to go guy you should be ashamed of yourself!”

Life doesn't have to imitate art

Some positive outcomes are that: 1) no one joined the customer/crook in berating the manager, 2) The manager held his ground, 3) the customer/crook’s effort to be loud and try to embarrass the manager into some free food, actually backfired, 4) a couple of us participated so that the crowd could see that the crook didn’t have any support.  I actually relayed a message to the manager that if he needed a witness on his side, I would gladly be that person. Loss prevention is not only important to the big corporations, it’s also important to the consumer.  If allowed to get out of control we will be paying $12 for a McDonald’s 89 cent burger.

There is still hope for our society because only a small percentage of anti-social people are raising Cain in public.  If we stick together for what’s right we can make a difference.  I pledge not to stand by while our society bottoms out.  The best is yet to come….

Discretion vs Valor

Discretion vs Valor

• Prov. It is good to be brave, but it is also good to be careful; if you are careful, you will not get into situations that require you to be brave. Son: Can I go hang gliding with my friends? 
• Father: No Son: But they'll say I'm chicken if I don't go! Father: Discretion is the better part of  valor, and I'd rather have them call you chicken than risk your life.

Growing up I was involved in two physical altercations by the age of 17.  It seems that back in the 60 the era of peace rallys and “love ins” physical altercations were not the norm.  On both occasions I got involved because someone else was getting beat up.  The funny thing is that on both occasions younger brothers of friends were being picked on by school bullies.  Had the fights been fair, one against one, I might not have gotten involved, but we all know that bullies don’t get into fair fights.

It seems that I was born with a good supply of common sense, a quality further enhanced by the special attention and upbringing by my parents.  While getting into altercations was never my first option, how to survive one or a plan to come out victorious was always a consideration.

As an example I never wanted to scar someone’s face, because the last thing I wanted, was to have someone remember me every time he looked in the mirror.  My goal was to disable my opponent to take the fight out of him.  My discretion with honor was the following, I lettered in football, wrestling, and track and field.  I had a reputation for being gutsy, and also the ability to withstand pain. Any of you readers that participated in football “the first sport of the school year,” must remember the excruciating pain that went with football practice.  The temperature alone was a 106 or better experience in mid to late August.  I remember being so tired and sore that I would go to sleep without dinner.  By the end of the second week of practice the body adjusted.

Our Lettermen’s Club was a group made up of all accomplished (proven) bravery type individuals and the old “All for one and one for all,” was alive and well.  We were never alone as individuals especially in our own town.  I was fortunate to have two memberships: the lettermen’s club, and my cultural club.  During the agricultural growing season from March to October a big influx of seasonal working families came to the area and their children were enrolled in school.  The high school age kids enjoyed hanging out with my group, and those that didn’t seek me out, I purposely went after their friendship because I wanted them feel like they belonged.  They were not seen as outsiders if they were part of an accepted school group that hung out together during lunch and free periods.

The two groups that I belonged to kept me from being tested by anyone that might want to gain a reputation by challenging me.  You see if I acted tough, and hung out with tough people no one would dare to challenge me.  And that is exactly how it worked out. That is until I found myself alone and deciding to intervene on two occasions when someone was being pummeled by two bullies. 

The first time I was winning the fight but I knew that I couldn’t last much longer fending these two guys off.  You never want to show your weakness, so they had no clue that the tide was about to change in their favor.  Fortunately a member of the school board was driving by, and he broke up the fight and took us to the Principal’s office.  Our next class was PE, so the instructor had us settle it with the gloves on while everyone in class watched.  One on one wasn’t fair for the bullies so I dispatched the first one with four punches and one swift kick to the groin (the coach said “no rules”).  The second one chose not to participate,

The second time I intervened to help someone, I once again drew the attention of the two bullies for interfering and this fight didn’t last long because my strategy was to disable them.  Every time they took a swing at me I would side step it and hit them with my knuckles on the boney part of the wrist, two or three hits like that and they decided they didn’t hate me that much.  By the way as they walked away they were mumbling that I didn’t fight fair.  Go figure.

As I’ve gotten older, I still feel safe because I usually have my two bodyguards handy; Mr. Smith and Mr. Wesson.  I am no longer likely to try to break up a fight, thank God for cell phones and 911.  The best is yet to come…………

Big Brother 30 Years Late

Big Brother 30 Years Late

Do you remember how scary the book and movie 1984 were.  I for one refused to believe that our society, government, and lives would ever reach that level of control.  After all those were the kinds of things that happened somewhere else in the world like Germany, and Russia but not in my country, the good old US of A.

Then 1984 came and went, we are all waiting for the other shoe to drop, but it didn’t drop.  Whew!  That was close; something predicted with so much authority, didn’t happen.  Must have been like the movie War of the Worlds, just good fiction.  Here we are now thirty years later, and guess what the story teller was off by a few years.

I hope you have been paying attention to what the NSA has been up to so I won’t have write a ten post series to explain all the intricacies of spying on other world government leader by the US Government.  How about the fact that your privacy is no longer private.  All cell phone calls are now listened too.  Our emails are scrutinized, even our automobile license plates can and are being tracked with the capability to determine where in the country you are at all times.

Do you know that most city’s law enforcement agencies have the capability to drive around with a unit inside the patrol car that scans license plates on the streets, and roads to determine the ownership of the vehicle, and whether you have any outstanding warrants, or owe parking citations?

Whatever happened to the government of the people by the people, for the people?  We are being handed a bill of goods, and not only do we not have a choice, we can’t even supervise the public servants that are controlling our lives.  When did we become so slack that all of a sudden the patients are running the institution?  As I have always said, the bill of goods is always sold as being for our own good, or protection.  If we are being protected to the point of being controlled, is it worth it?  Here is another point to show you that we haven’t seen the worst of it.  Remember it’s always sold as for the purpose of serving us better:

·       Jason McInerney and his wife, Melissa, recently tapped their lunch orders onto a touchscreen at the entrance to the Be Our Guest restaurant at Florida's Walt Disney World Resort and were told to take any open seat. Moments later a food server appeared at their table with their croque-monsieur and carved turkey sandwiches.

·       Asks McInerney, a once-a-year visitor to Disney theme parks: "How did they know where we were sitting?"

·       The answer was on the electronic bands the couple wore on their wrists. That's the magic of the MyMagic+, Walt Disney's (DIS -0.50%) $1 billion experiment in crowd control, data collection, and wearable technology that could change the way people play -- and spend -- at the "Most Magical Place on Earth." ~ By Christopher Palmeri, Bloomberg BusinessWeek

 

Remember always, all this extra effort is so they can anticipate your every need!  Never mind that they can’t keep NSA away from the data, and they will now know even more about us, and how we spend your recreational time.  Oh! I almost forgot when they get hacked by some low life living in his mother’s basement in Slobovia, they will access all your information.  I sure do hope; the best is yet to come….

Comfort Zone

Comfort Zone

People close to me know that I don’t like change for change sake.  I don’t even like necessary change.  I don’t mind change initiated by me, but I have to think long and hard about that.

The comfort of familiarity comes at a cost that we are often not even aware of.  Who in their right mind would think that there is a price to be paid for enjoying the comfort or comforts that you so willingly embrace.  After all costs are most often associated with change, rather than stability, right?

I most often have the latest in computers, cell telephones, iPads, and any other technological advances.  Truth be known those changes are brought about by the desire to have the advantage in the ever changing world of communications and technology.  If the world of technology were to once again become stable (stale-slow) as in the 70’s and 80’s I would be in hog heaven.  The years when the IBM Selectric II typewriter, and Motorola Beeper were the technological wonders of the world for long stretches of time.  You didn’t have to update equipment every six months to keep up with the Joneses.

By surrounding ourselves with familiarity, we are most often creating a protective shield that keeps outsiders out of our circle.  Outsiders are a source of information that keeps us growing as individuals, in a competitive environment.  Our subconscious tendencies are to seek out people that think like us because they reinforce our attitudes, and way of doing things.  Please understand that this is not necessarily a bad thing, as long as we are aware of what we are doing (accomplishing).

 

One can actually compare the above information to someone who is successful but enjoys being surrounded by “yes men.”  Even when these individuals are making bad decisions they are constantly being praised and validated by the “yes men” they surround themselves with.  This environment when sustained for long periods of time can lead to self-destruction of the successful individual(s).  You may not agree with me and that is totally fine, after all my disclaimer as usual is that, this is one humble man’s opinion.

Two famous examples of self-destruction that come to mind: Elvis Presley, and Michael Jackson.  Their entourage (handlers, hangers-on) catered to their every whim, and eventually all their fame, money and popularity couldn’t save them from self-destruction.

There are two popular sayings (practices) that come to mind, that exemplify the subject of this post: “think outside the box,” and encouraging the view of “an outsider looking in.”  If you are comfortable with doing things the same way year in and year out, you are missing out on the most important element to what you are doing and that is the opportunity to: advance; evolve; grow, and thus stay competitive.

Truth be told I still don’t like change but I embrace it cautiously because it is a necessity to stay relevant.  The best is yet to come….

Humility and Service

WW II Memorial

 One of my first contacts with a World War II Veteran happened when I had been in the United States only a couple of years.  This fine gentleman entered my life and family when my mother met my future step-father.  I have a quasi-policy of not mentioning names in the process of posting to this blog so I will continue to honor that policy.  Believe me when I tell you how proud I am of this individual, and the type of life he lead during the period of time that I knew him. 

I am sorry to say that I lost contact with many of our Texas family members a few years after we moved to the Pacific Northwest.  I still lament at the realization of how fast the years go by, and how easily you lose contact.  The person I am referring to became my uncle through marriage, he served in the Army with honor, and returned home to his wife with the memory of the horrors of war, and yet a humble and honorable man.  A great example to the many people that were in his life or crossed his path along the way. 

End of WW II Parade in New York

Those of us that belong to the proud Baby Boomer Generation (any person born between 1946, and 1964) but didn’t serve in the military were influence by these fine returning WWII Veterans.  This extremely brave men that had so proudly served their country had come home to set an example to the rest of us on how to be humble, and of service to others.  Unlike today’s society where 4 letter words are very common in regular verbal communications, our growing up years included such words as: yes sir, yes mam, please, and thank you.

The most beautiful thing that I admire about our military, and particularly the WWII Veterans is that while they are, and will always be heroes to common civilians like me, they don’t see themselves as heroes, and they simply feel grateful to have been given the opportunity to serve their country.

My uncle that I mentioned above was a hardworking man that proudly and more than adequately provided for his family.  As with most men of that period of time (the 1950’s), he was the sole provider for his family unit, and a loving father to his three children.  I have other uncles that served their country during time of war, but this person was the first time that I became aware of the leadership role that this men assumed when they returned from war.

Life in this country has changed so much that I am not sure that we will ever find our way back, at least not on automatic pilot as some things used to evolve.  A concerted effort will be required to get our society back on track.  I recently heard a program where it was reported that there are now approximately one million WWII Veterans left alive, they are dying at the rate of hundreds per day.

If you know any WW II Veterans, and you get an opportunity to have a conversation, ask them if they are interested in sharing any of their war experiences with you.  That priceless resource won’t be around forever.  Take advantage while you can.  The best is yet to come….