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Friday, May 17, 2013

On Being Macho

Being Macho


/ˈmɑ tʃoʊShow Spelled [mah-choh] Show IPA


1.  having or characterized by qualities considered manly, especially when manifested in an assertive, self-conscious, or dominating way.

2.  having a strong or exaggerated sense of power or the right to dominate.

noun, plural ma·chos.

3.  Also, ma·cho·ism. assertive or aggressive manliness; machismo.

4.  an assertively virile, dominating, or domineering male.

Macho (from Urban dictionary(

Male who cannot "lose face" in front of his mates or women. Most macho men have the emotional range of a teaspoon and have enough empathy to fill the ink tube in a pen.

Most all Latino, Hispanic, Mexicans, or whatever other designation we go by, are saddled with the broad brush definition of being Macho.  The definitions above were about as kind as they get.  As you read this post you will come to understand what my definition for myself is, if I am even considered to have a Macho Mentality.  I would prefer to think that we are all individuals, and are the product to a large degree of our upbringing.  My father was a loving kind individual that treated my mother and other people around him with much respect.  I would like to think that I inherited my father’s (and mother’s) qualities.

Macho mentality is manifested in many ways, two major ones are as follows (per my experience); 

  • No challenge must go unanswered;  Whether the challenge be who can drink the most alcoholic drinks, who can eat the hottest chili peppers (example; Cinco de Mayo, Jalapeno eating contest), who can press the most weight, who can drive the fastest (street racing), who can handle the most physical pain.  The list goes on forever.
  • The one I dislike the most and see the most often; while hanging out at a club or bar with friends (male buddies), one will dare another to walk up to an attractive girl and get her phone number.  If he don’t want to do it, it must be because he is afraid of his wife or girlfriend (which ever he has).  I also dislike the attitude that because you are the man you must be in charge (in the relationship), or that your job is more important than your wife’s or live-in girlfriend’s.

I know that I come from a different period of time and for all intents and purposes, it may as well have been a different planet.  I was trained at an early age to respect my elders, address adults (teachers, officials etc.) with Sir, or Madame, or the designation for Mister, and Misses.  I was to always wait my turn when going through a door, and where possible hold the door open for the ladies or elderly.  I know that it sound like the Credo that Comic book Heroes live by; but to always stand for what’s right, tell the truth, respect and salute the flag, and to stand up for the underprivileged and down trodden.
In my personal relationship, I’ve always believed that two heads are better than one, but only if truly applied in practice.  Not all battles are worth fighting to win because while you may win the battle, quiet often you lose the war.  Someone once described a good leadership role in the home as that of a benevolent dictator.  When it comes to raising children, a parent should always be a parent, you should work your way into being a trusted and equal friend, but you never lose the responsibility of being a parent, until they reach the age of majority (and beyond).  I love my family, and they love me, more than anything I am human, I am always trying; I’m sure they feel that sometimes, I am more trying than others.  The best is yet to come….

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