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Tuesday, March 12, 2013



The value of friendship may be expressed as the benefit gained from a friend who is consistently demonstrating any of the following:

  • The tendency to desire what is best for the other
  • Sympathy and empathy
  • Honesty, even in situations where it may be difficult for others to speak the truth
  • Mutual understanding and compassion ability to go to each other for emotional support
  • Enjoyment of each other's company
  • Trust in one another
  • Positively strong, deep, close reciprocity mutuality—equal give-and-take between the two parties
  • The ability to be oneself, express one's feelings and make mistakes without fear of judgment.
We as individuals set up different values to measure our friendship, some even consider friends what I would simply call acquaintances.  I normally don’t ponder this question because I am very firm in how I determine who my friends are.  Not all my friendships are a natural fit.  Sometimes I admire a person’s way a being and decide that I want to develop a friendship.  Sometimes getting to know a person better, can make you change your mind, about bringing them into your close circle.  Other friendships automatically develop over time.  It’s not like they have to prove themselves, but somehow they just do through their consistent actions over time (those are the best friendships for me).

I’ve said before that if you are lucky, you will have one or two “Best Friends,” in your life time.  I guess I am very lucky in that sense.  Great friends don’t have to be in constant touch.  However, whenever the opportunity presents itself to communicate in writing or verbal, it’s like there hasn’t been a long passage of time between contacts, you just pick up where you left off.
My friend Joe L. called me once after I had relocated to my new position at headquarters, and didn’t connect so he left me a voice message.  He informed me that he his wife and their daughter would be traveling from the Northwest to Kansas City by Motor home, he would be dropping the ladies off at their other daughter’s home and from there the 3 ladies would be flying to Paris for a 3 week vacation.  He would drive the motor home back to the Northwest, and would only be out of town for about a week.  I called him back but didn’t connect either so I left him a voice message, wishing him a safe trip, and to have fun.

On this part of the story is where my wife’s wisdom shines through; that night over dinner I casually mentioned to my wife the conversation that I had with Joe over voice messaging.  She immediately asked me to contact Joe and see if he needed help driving the motor home back.  I told my wife that I wasn’t sure that I could take the time from work for a road trip.  She would not take no for an answer, after all Joe was 80 years old, and my wife was concerned that he could get into an accident.
By the time I was able to make contact with Joe using the original cell phone (BRICK), he had already started the drive back.  I am grateful for my wife, and her intervention. She got me a last minute plane ticket to Denver Colorado, and a short commuter flight to Cheyenne Wyoming where I met up with my friend, had dinner and spent the night before driving safely the rest of the way back to the Northwest.  I honestly believe that my friend would have been in a world of hurt if not worst, but for my wife’s caring intervention.  That is what real friends do; I am a better person (friend) with a little help from my wife.

For sentimental reasons I’ve waited longer than I should have to re-allocate the title of “Best Friend,” but I’ve known for a while now that I had a best friend in my friend Mike M.  Take care of your friends; they are hard to come by.  Unfortunately Facebook serves to water down the value of what a friend is.  The best is yet to come…..

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