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Wednesday, June 3, 2015

May - December Romance

May - December Romance

I was recently reading some articles on romances where the couples, whether married or not are at least separated by 10 years in age.  I did get the logic of calling any romance separated by 10 years or more “May –December.”  However, since we are using months to show the age of the individuals in the relationship and life expectancy in Washington State for males is 77.77, and 82 years for females, for the sake of easy calculation lets average the two to 80 years of age.

Having setup the formula first, now we can say that if the male is the older in the relationship and 80 is the life expectancy that would make December 31st, equal to 80 years of age. So the young female at the May month would be somewhere approximately in her mid-30’s, that would take the romance out of the May – December Romance moniker. A couple where the bride is 36 and the groom is between 73 and 80 sounds more like a nurse – patient relationship.  I hate to say it because I grew up reading Playboy for the articles (of course), but it sounds like a marriage that could only take place (regularly) at the Playboy Mansion.
Pinky Promise

  • May-December relationships have at least an 11-year age span between the parties. The vast majority of May-December marriages take place between older men and younger women. According to the most recent U.S. census, 7.4 percent of husbands are 10 or more years older than their wives.
  • But that trend is starting to change. A 2003 AARP report, “Lifestyles, Dating and Romance,” found that 8 percent of women older than 39 were dating men at least 10 years younger.
  • Hollywood has long been a breeding ground for May-December romances. Charlie Chaplin famously wed Oona O’Neill when she was 18 and he was 54. Warren Beatty is 21 years older than his wife, Annette Bening. Harrison Ford, 70, is married to Calista Flockhart, 48. Clint Eastwood is 82; wife Dina Ruiz-Eastwood is 35 years younger (they’re getting a divorce).
  • Why choose a partner from a vastly different age group? Research conducted at University of Gothenburg and Oxford University and published in the journal Evolutionary Psychology found that women wanted older men because of their solid financial resources and high social status. Men have always sought younger female partners.The study also found that the majority of women older than 60 were looking for younger men.
  • While many May-December couples report they’ve found the love of their life, they’re likely to encounter certain challenges. They may grapple with an imbalance of power. When one party has more life experience, money and prestige, he or she may exert more authority over the other.
  • Partners age at different rates. No matter how youthful the older person feels or acts, the calendar inevitably catches up. ~ BY LINDA LEWIS GRIFFITH 

I can tell you from my fairy tale romance (life), that the first time I saw my wife I was struck by her physical beauty, the fact that she was in college said volumes about her intelligence, and the minute she spoke I was amazed at her maturity beyond her obvious youth.  The chance meeting took place at my office where I was a college counselor (not the same college where she was enrolled).  She had dropped by to take her brother to lunch, and her brother was in a meeting with me in my office, he was a co-worker and also a counselor (to this day we are related and great friends).

To make a very long and loving story short, that beautiful woman that walked into my life unexpectedly on her 18th birthday, and I married two weeks later.  We just celebrated our most recent anniversary last month (our youngest daughter is 30 years old and we have 3 other children together).  Today I am retired (early retirement), and she enjoys her career she plans to keep working a little longer.  Little did I know that I would go from being the more experience partner in the relationship to being a “kept man.”  I love my life and my present status and for the record I consider our romance a March – May Romance!  The best is yet to come……..


  1. And you are kept well my friend and very fortunate. Your early retirement will give you the 80 years plus and I know you are always busy with projects.

    1. Thank you my friend, I am a happy camper and pretty much stress free. (I might add, healthier perhaps than I deserve having lived a life as a daredevil: raced cars, and motorcycles).